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Everywhere I proceed people ask me one thing, “Excuse me, do you function here? ”
It used to bug me personally until I decided to have enjoyable with it.
Last year an old lady stopped me personally in the aisle at the home entertainment store. She said, “Excuse me, do you work right here? ” I walked the girl over to a nearby television and said, “As a matter of fact, ma’am, yes I do. Let me show you this… Sony Trinitron… right here. It’s regularly dollar 3500. Today we are letting it go for 100 bucks. ”
“And we kind of like you, ma’am. If you give me 5 twenties right now, I’ll help you carry it to the car. ”
Since them I have produced many answers to the query, “Excuse me, do you function here? ”
At the appliance store: “Yes, I do. Let me show you this new refrigerator. The crisper increases as a garbage disposal. This is for those times you are joking yourself and decide to consume healthy and buy 3 mind of lettuce and a bunch of vegetables and then two weeks later on you haven’t touched a single carrot. The crisper/garbage removal eliminates the need to remove the veggies to throw them away. ”
At the Sears tire store: “Yes, I do. Ma’am, your car will be ready. I outfitted your own Honda Accord with five feet high truck wheels. You need a ladder to get within but now you can roll over the kid’s bikes laying in the driveway. ”
At the DMV: “Yes, I do. Let me tell you about our brand new system. Instead of you waiting in line at the DMV, from now on the DMV will come to your house. We’ll wait outside for one hour, then you come out plus tell us we’re in the incorrect line. ”
At the zoo: “Yes, I do. Let me show you this new show we call Media geek. It is full of animals that have extended their careers via serious overexposure in the press. If you’ll just look into our feeding area right now you’ll see Dennis Rodman, Pamela Anderson and Tommy shelter. ”
At the computer store-: “Yes, I do. We’ve started a new program in the computer industry. We will give you the computer for free. after that, you send us a check for $ 5 for any day you don’t have a problem with it. ”
At an auto parts store: “Yes, I do, Let me show you this unique exhaust system. It plays music tunes to match your car. the particular pickup truck model plays Willie and Waylon’s ‘Mamas Don’t Let your Babies Grow up to be Republicans’. ”
At the sporting goods store- “Yes, I do. Are you a multiple-sport athlete? As you know, baseball is getting as violent as handbags. Let me show you this combination football bat and hockey stay. With this you’ll be able to hit house runs AND have fun shedding it to get in battles with the other team. ”
At the cafe: “Yes, I do. You are fortunate because it is ladies day.
I’m just a nut for funny stuff.: )
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